I'M AMERICAN - DO I HAVE A CULTURE?

Another thing that is very much part of our family and defines us is the fact that we are bilingual/bicultural. My husband is from Argentina. We speak Spanish at home and my son didn't speak a word of English until he after he turned three years old. My husband, is of course a native speaker and I learned the language.

I'm American- do I really have a culture?

So, what does it mean to be an American? I'm not Indian or Asian or Hispanic. I was born here and have no real customs from my heritage. I'm a European mutt- half Italian, the rest Irish and British. I have no other language that I grew up with, no typical foods, etc...so I never thought that I really had a culture. Until I met Rafa, and on some major, and many minor issues we clashed.

I realized I guess that I do have typical food dishes as an American. When I was abroad, the only things I missed were a good cheeseburger and a good pizza – honestly, that was it. So cliché American...

There is the risk-taking, entrepeneuraial mentality that is engrained in our culture. Come to America. Work hard, and you will succeed. It is the land of opportunity. Be independent.

There is a lot of pressure here in the United States to fit into a mold, everything “should” be done a certain way at a certain time, in a certain order. I myself am guilty of this at times. We have these "milestones" that we want so badly to stick to - like a bible - if they don't do "x" by "y" time, freak out.  


I am also the parent that pushes my son to do things by himself and be more independent (which is not always a bad thing, so maybe we balance each other out well). I pushed to go to a daycare when he was young to “socialize” with other kids, instead of being at home, which is the most important place to be. My husband was never keen on these things. 


 We don't let kids do nothing, even though their “nothing” are the best learning experiences for them. Learning is not done by paying $250 for a structured class. There are always 400 things for kids to do- practices, classes, etc... And, I'm learning from my husband- instead of my cookie-cutter ideas (an effect of my culture), to let our kids be. They will do/learn when they are ready.


I would like to add that it is not JUST culture that shapes your values and ideals.  A LOT has to do with your family, the way you grew up - and that also comes into play in our family now.

We have something to learn from each other as parents.  My push for independence, and his loving sheltering and protecting.

I am proud of the ideals and values we both have and hope to instill in our children. We balance each other out nicely.